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Grumble + 6: Why I don't meeting famous people

This stems from the time I went to a Judge Dredd comic signing session. I was in trouble from the moment that I decided to ask the guy to put his moniker on it, rather than just sign it. Then the words came out wrong and I asked him to put his monocle on it. Security were very gentle with me on the way out.

I met Tony Hawks, the comedian, once too, and was rubbish then as well. And I saw Emlyn Hughes in a pub in Barrow once but thankfully didn't speak to him when we were together in the gents. He was a lot smaller in real life than he looked on the telly. I also had a bit of sharp word for James Nesbitt when he was shooting a commercial for an Asda drinks promotion in Leeds. Well, it was late morning on Saturday, very busy, lots of shopping to do and they were blocking the aisles with the film crew. 

I'd hate to be famous but I'd like to know someone who was so I could sort of experience it by proxy. But I get overwhelmed by the impression that I have to be suitably impressed and say the rights things, and my brain melts so I must seem like an idiot. So my chances of ever having a famous friend are probably nil.

My recent positive experience with two England cricket stars has tempered this grumble but not eliminated it altogether.